My Mission Statement

I write to serve, to unite, to educate. I write to share literature and flesh out ideas that may be of interest to others. I write to document an emotion, experience, or a blip in time. My mission is to write in such a way that the reader is reminded that we can find humor in all situations. It's one of the great blessings of life.


Monday, September 29, 2008

Redneck Recipes and Redneck Parenting Tips

Let's suppose a parent has a new interest or hobby, say tennis, golf, or FACEBOOK. This parent might be looking for a few timesavers in her homelife, so she can pursue her new interest for HOURS ON END. Here are a few Redneck Parenting Tips for such a parent. Timesaving Tips for Redneck Parents:
1. Turn the TV on BEFORE they get home from school, then they won't be tempted to talk to you or waste time hugging or snuggling or anything else like that. They can go straight to spongebob.
2. Put out the cereal, hell, LEAVE it out, so they can make all their own meals and even bring you that Special K dinner you crave. One caveat, you will occasionally have to move the milk in and out of the fridge. Unless...well, you could keep a beer cooler full of ice on the counter, then you wouldn't have to get up to move the milk!
3. Send your husband a sexy e-mail at work, so he'll already feel loved while you multi-task. Then if he comes in the door and you're busy on the computer, he'll think you're just sending him another one.
4. Teach your children to check each others' homework. Reward them with extra television shows.
Just a start, but you'll be surprised how a little ingenuity will get you on Facebook in no time.

Redneck Recipe of the Week- No kidding--this one is good. A tasty twist on the redneck staple-meatloaf.

Grease a glass pie plate with olive oil. Line the bottom of the plate with roasted red peppers. Then sprinkle a little shredded Mexican cheese blend over it. In another bowl, mix a couple of eggs, a pound or so of ground beef, a slosh or two of salsa, and shredded carrots for good health--sshhh, kids'll never know, oh, and a good shake of bread crumbs. Press the mixture on top of the cheese and peppers. Top with a bit more salsa, more cheese, then bake at 350 for 40 minutes or so. Yummy with mashed potatoes.

Hope you all had a great Monday! I've been writing like a crazy woman! xoxo

5 comments:

Diane said...

Ha ha ha! I've been overwhelmingly frightened to even EXPLORE Facebook for fear that I may get, well, sucked into it like quick sand.... but now, with these time-saving tips, perhaps...

Dorothy said...

Thanks for the recipe. It sounds delicious. Where do you come up with these things?

I think Facebook is a waste of time unless you want to use it for some devious self promotion in art or maybe writing. Or looking at someone's photos. Funny funny tips you gave to free up time to dabble in it.
Today I became friends with Jody's dog,I forget its name. Leave it to her to point out how ridiculous the process is by making a page for her dog. I may write him a message when I get time.

alison said...

Are you being cynical or sarcastic about his whole facebook thing? I really can't tell. Either way, I don't really think it's the end of our moral society. One could say the same things about blogging.

Donna Jones Koppelman said...

Kidding, kidding, kidding! And I know you're all getting bored of the subject, so I promise to leave it alone for a while! Thanks for visiting! (and commenting!)

Nicole Feliciano said...

I just found your blog thanks to 5Mins for Mom. LOL on the Redneck mom stuff. I'll also try to check out the Pirate book.

As for me, I'm trying to drum up some lat minutes entries for my October contests. I've got 1-2-3-4 fashion-themed giveaways running at http://momtrends.blogspot.com/

Contests all end tonight. There's even one just for moms--win a Lucy Activewear Breast Cancer awareness tee. Here's that link:

http://momtrends.blogspot.com/2008/09/lucy-tee-contest-and-chic-moms-guide.html

Isabel by Donna Jones Koppelman

Isabel by Donna Jones Koppelman

Major Bear at the Grove Park Inn by Donna Jones Koppelman

Major Bear at the Grove Park Inn by Donna Jones Koppelman